We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
