Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
