thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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