Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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