If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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