I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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