Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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