you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
