We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He better not be in your backpack
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
third nipple confirmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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