it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I am available for nakedness
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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