its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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