Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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