dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
