mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
soo... how was my night?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
