Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
