Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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