you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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