Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
