If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
