I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Pooping to opera.
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