I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
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