Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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