you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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