I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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