You really coming over, don't trick.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
