Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
