we made out on top of his cat.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
