I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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