Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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