He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just gift wrapped bread.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
