Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
