My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Success! We fucked roommates!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
