i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
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Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
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he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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