Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
