If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
