Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
