how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
