Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
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She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
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Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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