This girl is more easily done than said...
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
