I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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