So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize