i may or may not be watching the land before time
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize