Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Come share oat with me in your robe
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
