the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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