She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
