I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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