Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
