Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize