Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
