her vagine was all disorganized.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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