I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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